Autism As A Whole

As a mom of two children with special needs I find that sometimes I feel jealous and envious of other parents. The parents that can go out to eat dinner without a scene or have a huge family dinner filled with laughter. I envy the parent whose two year old speaks and even the baby that smiles back at you when you smile. I envy it because it is something I have missed out on with some of my children. I have four children and they are all different and very special. I love them all and while I do not wish to change them I still find it hard seeing my boys around NT boys their age. I see the differences and it hurts. It is kind of like rubbing pure alcohol on a fresh open wound. I try to pretend that it doesn't but sometimes I find myself watching another child and if the parent says anything I will blurt out,"Enjoy that cause some of us don't have that!"

Things have been looking pretty dreary here lately and I have been getting depressed. Charles has a ton of doctors to see about his muscle atrophy and I have been very concerned. Christmas is almost here and approaching very fast. I wasn't even sure how I was going to manage Christmas this year with many unexpected purchases. With lots of thanks to Jessica from Jessica Hester Photography and Ellen Seidman  from Love That Max, who connected me with Betsy Helmick, for your help in making Christmas a lot brighter for my wonderful children. I cannot thank you all enough.



I have applied for a grant from the Autism Society to provide Chucky with a Snuggle Swing, which is sold by a wonderful small family owned company. Sensory Goods was created to meet the needs of people affected with developmental disabilities while understanding the financial needs of those caring for them. They carry an assortment of items including chew tubes, swings, weighted products and even more. I do encourage you to take a look at their products and they are priced very reasonable too!

The owner has two children diagnosed with Autism and understands the struggles. I felt comfortable speaking with him and he was very kind. I had spoken about the swing and he had suggested a weighted blanket which Chucky does not have. He does however have two big heavy blankets that he sleeps with year round regardless of how hot it may be. He had suggested I get a weighted blanket and I had said that I would come at a later time because finances were tight and that was a purchase I cannot make right now. This generous parent did something that still has my emotions on a roller coaster. He bought my son a beautiful weighted blanket with the most comfortable weighted beads he had. I wanted to thank Cal from Sensory Goods for providing my son with this product. I plan on doing a review when it is received and telling everyone what my son thinks. Actually, maybe I will let him tell Cal himself!!

So, things are looking up for the end of December and a lot of things are starting to fall into place. My son's service coordinator also came out to the house and we completed all of the paperwork to get some behavioral therapy started and hopefully some respite. Sometimes things seem pretty bleak but I am so hapy there are caring individuals out there to help bring a little light into my tunnel. I cannot thank everyone enough!! Merry Christmas Everyone, We survived another year and to address January, my cursed month, BRING IT ON CAUSE THIS MAMA IS ARMED AND READY!!!

With lots of love from my family to yours,
Charlene, Chucky, Buddy, Chipmunk and Princess

Well, It has been such a long year and I guess I haven't thought much about the holidays. The holidays are always a bit tough because it makes you think about all the loved ones who cannot join you in person with the festivities but we have created ways to include them even if we cannot sit beside them and hug them.

 We have my father's elf which I used to hide in the Christmas tree for the children to find but, umm..... many broken ornaments later and we have changed that tradition. We now go with the elf on a shelf theory and the elf moves every day. The child that finds the elf gets to re hide it. So while our elf did not cost 40.00 it is priceless to us!!

When I think of Christmas, I think of joy, happiness, love and togetherness. Unfortunately some of us do not have family gatherings and lots of friends to share our joy with. Some of us have a hard time seeing past the issues with grandparents not coming over and family members that feel ignored by our children. I know personally it breaks my heart to see a family member walk right past my child because they don't seem remotely interested in them. The look on someones face as my son opens a present with no emotion and they thought they would love it. But... they do love it just can't show it! I plan on trying to get through the season without having to cope with those things. We choose to celebrate with only immediate family. The ones who try so hard all year to be there and the ones who are always there to enjoy the good times and try to help through the bad. I choose to enjoy our holiday.

As I ask myself what I want for Christmas I have to say that I want my children to enjoy their Christmas. I want them to have a fulfilling holiday that will erase all of the stress from the year. I know that is unreasonable but it seems like things will never end. Every time I think that things are getting better another issue arises. But.... this is not what I wanted this post to be about.

1. Each of my children getting the one thing on their wishlist that they want.
2. A bottle of Jack Daniels (everyone needs to relax )
3. A new camera because mine is breaking and I may go insane.
4. A winter coat 
5. NO MORE DIAGNOSIS's

Tones on Tuesday

I wasn't sure if this Qualified for Throat Punch Thursday at If This Is Motherhood , so I commented and Debi read my post  ensuring me that it is in fact a Throat Punch Week and fits. So here it is. I share it with you all.