Autism As A Whole

 I didn't want this space to be filled with the negative hardships that I go through everyday. I wanted it to be a good resource for other parents, but if I don't include the trying moments it seems unreal. My house is never calm which I wish were different.

How do I find the moment to blog? Hmm... well I must confess that I blog while my children are eating and I blog when they go to sleep. Sometimes I spend the late nights reading other blogs in hope to find that miracle trick that other parents use to juggle everything they need to juggle while maintaining a happy home.

For those parents who can clean the house, have time with your spouse and your children, I give you a lot of credit. I don't know how they do it. I swear they must have a bunch of closets to shove everything into. I mean, how else can they do it? Just shove it in a closet and pray to god no one opens it. It is no wonder they take people's coats instead of having guests hang them in the closet. They would open the door and everything imaginable, including that month old banana peel, would bury them alive!

 My boyfriend thrives from quiet and calmness, which I feel I cannot provide. My children speak very loud because we always seem to have to compete with screaming. I think I have become immune to it. I can carry on a conversation with an adult while maintaining my children's needs. There are times that I can be talking to an adult and dealing with a meltdown at the same time. I know it may seem rude but the majority of my day is spent dealing with one issue after another. Does anyone else feel as if there is never a dull moment?

5/24/2011
Chucky Cheese is progressing well lately and that makes me smile. His speech is amazing and he surprises me every day with a new word. He really is a smart child. I remember when I would beg for him to speak and now I find myself begging for a volume button! The meltdowns are still there and we struggle with them every day. The meltdown kit helps him through them and I have begun to set more boundaries.

Well, summer school has ended and the chaos never seems to end. I clean, they mess, I clean again. Physical fights and screaming throughout the day. I am not sure how every other parent does it without losing their minds. Any thoughts? I went camping with some friends and all of my children and it went pretty good. At least better than expected!! There were a few meltdowns but they were manageable. It seemed to be a stressful trip for me though because I was walking on egg shells not sure what would trigger them.

Nevertheless, we had fun and the best part was the kids faces when they went swimming in the lake. Chucky loved the Orange buoys.  My camera broke when we were there so that is an extra stresser cause I don't have enough right? Chucky has been having toileting issues as of late and I am not sure how to handle it. He is wetting himself throughout the day. Isn't regression great? I am so excited to clean pee off of every floor in my house. Yippeee!!! Sorry for the sarcasm but I did say I was stressed.

I haven't been blogging as much cause it is so hard to concentrate anymore. I cant sit here for more than 3 min without an interruption and then I never seem to get back. When I do, there is other things on my mind and I just cant write. I hope this gets better with school coming up and I can sit down and maybe finish some of the 50 drafts that I had started but couldn't finish but don't hold your breathe. I just wish some of this craziness would ease off for a little while. Well, that was a scream crash boom...... Gotta go!!!!

So, today I decided to allow Chipmunk to have a sleepover. We invited her friend Emily to spend the night.  I thought it would be great cause it would keep her occupied. Boy was I wrong. She had such an attitude over Princess playing with her friend. She said E was her friend and should only play with her. I am not talking about a minor hissy fit. She was in tears pouting and yelling at her sister as well as her friend.

As any other "good" mom would do, I mirrored her attitude and told her that maybe we don't need to have sleep overs ever. That just made her more upset. Well, I really had to come up with a natural consequence that would resolve the issue while teaching a lesson.

So, I told Princess she could not play with them and I told Chipmunk that since she had a friend over and wanted her sole attention she could not play with anyone but Emily. This didn't seem to phase her at all at first. She went along playing dolls with E. Then I had to calm Chucky Cheese down cause he loves to play stuffies with E and that was not able to happen under my rules. When Chipmunk heard Chucky going she got very quiet and started to say something but cut herself off saying never-mind.

Do any of your ids do that? Chipmunk has the most annoying habit of starting to say something and stopping mid word as if you had interrupted her and saying ugh.. never mind. But, I never interrupted her or even spoke to give her the feeling I wasn't listening. It really is annoying and I have given up on asking her what she wants, needs or feels. Now I tell her,"When you are ready to talk to me I am here." She hates that comment cause she wants me to beg for info. Nah uh... not happening!! I am stubborn too.

Well, all went well until Chipmunk and E needed a tall person to pick some apples and I chimed in all sweet, "Sorry sweets, you didn't want your sister to play with you two so she cant help you." I suggested she use a stool. As she came in to find it she asked for help so I kindly obliged. I found the stool and called her name. She responded with a "WhhhhAAAATTTT". I was definitely taken back by that tone. I told her she had better tone her voice down with me or I would just send her friend home now and she shrugged her shoulders saying, Fine whatever. I couldn't believe her careless response so I then said,"and, if they want you to sleep over you wont be able too." She still shrugged her shoulders and said fine whatever.

The next statement though that followed right after that blew my mind. She then said,"I will just go home as well." When she says home she is referring to her fathers because we have joint custody but she is primarily there. I didn't even hesitate or flinch at that remark cause Mommy was on a roll. The words slipped of my tongue like water on baby oil. I said, Honey, you are home. She looked at me with a blank stare whipped her body around and walked out side. The look of defeat was clearly written all over her face. I won!!!

Well, the rest of the evening started to look up and in the end they were all playing nicely. I guess the saying,"You never know what you have until its gone", really held true today. I am proud that I managed to hold all my frustration in cause she really was pushing on my final nerve and I noticed when I started to lose my composure the slight grimace of accomplishment on her face. But... Mommy won hands down today!!