Strangers Are Good For Many Reasons.....

I have noticed lately that my posts are not getting many comments. I hope that this is not because of the pathetically depressing posts my fingers are typing. I know that in my blog I mostly discuss my children and how having special needs children is as a household. I try to keep it positive because there are positive aspects. Last week though is a complete blur. I have been recovering my sanity and I found the perfect cure. Listen up this is good!!!

During my mental breakdown, that was seriously triggered by a diagnosis, I called my local Mental Health. I  cried and told them I needed an appointment really quick. They got me in amazingly quick, they probably though I was going to go postal if they didn't. Yes, I was that upset. It was ridiculous but normal. I went into the appointment and was a bit nervous because I haven't needed therapy in almost 5 years. I was taking 20 steps backwards, or so I thought. You see in 2 hours I explained my whole issue. He asked how I was and I said, I;m here, and I'm still alive. He nonchalantly said, well thats two points for you. I don't know why but he was comforting and easy to talk to, although I am sure that any stranger that would listen to me cry and complain for two hours would have worked. I just chose the costliest method.

I explained about my boys and all that had happened for the week. I explained why I felt to blame and even asked a few questions, but he didn't have to answer them because I answered them myself.  I probably sounded like a ranting lunatic that wasn't even coming up for air. But... After I vented, he said the most amazing words. He told me that he would be overwhelmed as well and it was overwhelming to listen to. While a part of me says that it is his job to make me feel better I want to believe that he understood. I can say that after I left the appointment I felt so much better. I started eating regularly again and I was happy. I slept really well that evening as well and the next day I felt like I could conquer anything. I think I was feeling a grief for my son and I had to release it  before I could move on.

Well the Mental Health agency called me yesterday to appoint me a therapist. Funny right? I told her that I wouldn't be able to go in for a couple weeks cause my son had appointments. I also told her that I wasn't sure I needed to go in at all because their intake worker was amazing and I felt 150% better after I talked with him. She stated that was great but it might be good to have a support there through this stressful time. I wonder if she really meant that or of she was saying it because of her paycheck. I am going to appease her and go back. My old therapist left and I was with her for a long time. I guess I should at least make sure that I have my mind together.